Martinelli's is Basically Champagne

And 9 More Novel Discoveries About Not Drinking

I am visiting my parents in California for a bit. Mahea and I got into LAX last night and for the first time ever (I think) I flew on an airplane without drinking or drinking prior. It was cool because I didn’t feel anxious like I usually do on planes. I typically DO NOT like flying, but last night flying didn’t bother me. No more than, say, catching your coat on a door handle. Inconvenient, but not fraught. My obligatory In-N-Out tasted better too. Small discoveries—like the fact that alcohol-free flying is anxiety-free flying—beget the bigger question: 

“What else can I learn? What is this alcohol-free experience supposed to teach me and how can I use that information to make my life happier, or at least, easier? Or at the very least, more stable?”

There are lots of things I’ve learned in my 47 days of not drinking. It feels longer than just six and a half weeks. It feels like a lifetime. Smoother air travel and a more satisfying protein-style grilled cheese notwithstanding, some of these things are useful, some novel, and some I wouldn’t have given a second thought had I not chosen this path. 

1. The peach-pear flavor of La Croix is the best and I found out I actually need it to survive. Beverages in general (see title) have become a big part of my life. Kombucha, coffee, tea, sparkling water, tonics, juices, I will take them all and not feel one single twinge of regret about spending $25 on them while I do it.

2. It’s way cooler than you think it will be to check the “no” box for alcohol consumption on medical intake forms like I did at the dermatologist last week.

3. There is a bizarre, dark, masochistic delight in not having a hangover when others around you do.

4. Getting stoned now makes me feel relieved and grateful, not guilty and ashamed. Is it because my conscience is clearer? Was weed always meant to be consumed singly? This is a conversation for another week. (I don’t want to hear about how smoking weed makes you “not sober”. My goal was to be alcohol-free, not fun-free.)

5. It’s so much easier to eat healthy. And to exercise—no aforementioned hangover to nurse. 

6. Human interactions are way more fun without alcohol. You get this contact buzz off socializing in a real and unclouded way. I think it might be adrenaline? Either way it gets you jacked. 

7. Makeup blends into my skin better. I’m assuming this is a hydration thing. I’m *dewy* and I’m loving it. 

8. It sucks remembering all the times you got too drunk. Very un-fun, do not recommend. 0/10.

9. Some people will exit your life. Others will come into it. Both are normal and expected. A friend I’ve known only casually for seven-ish years called me today on a whim and offered kind words of wisdom and support. That would have never happened otherwise.

10. It’s not the champagne I miss, it’s just the bubbles and heavy bottle.